... on being authentic.

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Rosevelt

I thought that the more time between the postings, I would feel different about this particular topic but I don't. Truth be told, I feel stronger about it -- as should be the case. Of course, this light bulb moment came about through a course. Then again, most of my epiphany-like moments stem from the interchange that's associated with a course -- at least that's been the case recently.

Through a course last semester, one area of focus was authencity of cultural (physical) sites -- especially as they pertain to existing Mississippi Delta landmarks as they're being marketed to tourists. Questions like "as these sites become more marketable, do they lose their authencity?" arose. We can certainly make the case for the authenticity of physical entities but can the same be made for more transient entities (i.e. people) as well? Of course, there might be a better word to describe such phenomena but the framework, mindset is what encapsulates my thoughts on this posting ... HUMOR ME, please!

While I don't regret moving to Mississippi, there's just something that happens to me whenever I come back from visiting family and friends in Illinois and other states. It's hard to explain but in a sense, I feel subdued -- almost unauthentic to myself. I know I am completely different than how I am now. Am I admitting to being a poser then? Not completely.

There are norms and standards everywhere you happen to be at and you try to assimilate yourself into them. Sometimes you're successful and sometimes you're not. I'll be the first to admit that it's been a year since I've moved and I haven't felt more out of place in all of my life ... ever. I'm well aware that I stand out (that's not a first either) but it's just taking a little longer than I had anticipated to get adjusted to being here.

So, what now?

We shall see ... that's absolutely terrifying or liberating.